A Christmas Janice
by Joel T Johnson
Carl rubbed his eyes to shake off the hypnosis of the road, an endless plunge into a swirl of streaking snow. The headlights weakly painted a small patch of road in front of them. Beyond it: an abyss of black and freezing cold. It could have been midnight, it could be 2:00AM.
He looked at the woman in the passenger seat and felt wide awake again.
“So this is Arizona?” Meg said shifting in her seat and brushing back her long brown hair. “I pictured it different.”
She tried pulling her jacket down again over her round belly. Carl lowered his head and looked up at the snow emerging from the darkness.
“Me too,” he said. “You ever been to California?”
“No, you?”
“This'll be the first. “
“It doesn't snow there does it?” she said.
“Not in Los Angeles, I don't think.”
Creeping fingers of snow, were starting to reach into the highway. The tires went silent each time they hit snow. The wind was picking up.
Meg looked at the man through her rose tinted specs. He'd risked a lot for her. She was glad it was too dark for Carl to look at the bruise under her eye.
“Carl?”
“Yes Megan.”
“Are we going to make it?”
“We'll be okay, if that's what you mean.”
“Will we to make it to LA? In time to meet your friend?”
“To be honest, I don't know,” he said.
The gas gauge was touching “E”. Carl reached into his pocket and felt three bills. Was it a five and two ones, or two fives and a one? It didn't matter, it wasn't going to be enough.
-----
Janice was the obvious choice to tend bar on Christmas eve. Harv usually threw her an extra hundred bucks to make up for the tips, but she would have done it anyway. Most years, hardly anyone at all came in. Who wouldn't want to get paid to watch TV and sneak a few cigarettes indoors?
It was a slow night, even for a Wednesday.
Even for Christmas eve.
Then there was the blizzard going on outside. There was something different about the wind that blew in when the door opened. The red and green Chinese lanterns jostled nervously.
A hunched figure came in with the wind, silhouetted against the neon beer lights. He was still hunkered against the cold and shaking when he sat down at the bar. His face was downward, not hiding, but hidden. He slipped his wool cap slowly off his head and kept it close to his body as if standing before a grave. His plain brown coat seemed to absorbed so much light it looked black. His hair was a mop of dark waves, the kind coming back into fashion, but this dude was no hipster, Janice thought.
His jacket stayed on.
He gestured to the spirits behind the bar with a shaking hand.
“Which?” said Janice, her arms crossed.
His finger darted about; it didn't matter.
Janice shrugged and grabbed a JD. She was about to add water when he waved it off.
Janice could tell he wasn't a drinker. It wasn't the way he drank, he didn't sputter or cough. It was the way he stared at it in the glass, as if he were waiting for it to speak to him.
He finished it off before it got the chance and motioned for another.
“Not so fast,” Janice said, “You driving?”
The man shrugged.
“Hello? Can you speak English?”
The stranger took pains to cough and cleared his throat.
“Yes, apparently I can.”
She might have figured him for a wise ass but his voice sounded like he truly might not have uttered a word in years.
She poured him another, leaned against the sink and went back to watching TV.
A little creepy, but this guy was also low maintenance. Probably a lousy tipper, but that was okay. If she was in this for the tips she'd be working at some bar that required showing skin and a tolerance for grabby assholes.
Janice felt her neck tense when her phone rang. The old school bell ringtone got louder when she fished it out of her purse.
“Hello?...
“Hi Janice it's me”
“Hi Maggy... oh wait, it's Margaret now. Did you mean to dial the country club and get me instead?”
“That's a heck of a way to talk to your sister”
“Correction, half sister.”
“I've never thought of you that way. Listen Janice, it's Christmas eve and your birthday, we'd love to have you over for dinner tonight, you should be with family.”
”I can't, I'm working”
“Oh darn it, just like last year.”
“Like every year Margaret. Let's be honest, you don't really want me to come over anyway, you just invite me to your big fancy house so you can say you tried and so don't feel bad.”
“I'm sorry you feel that way Janice. You know, I can't do this right now. If you change your mind we really would love to have you. We're going to Ed's parents' tomorrow so.”
“I'm not going to change my mind.”
“Well... Merry Christmas Janice.”
“Yeah, well Christmas can kiss my ass.”
“Bye, I love you you know.”
“Yeah, I know. Love you too.”
Janice tossed her phone back in her purse and noticed the stranger was staring.
“What? You think I should be nicer to my sister?”
“That phone... I've never...”
“Seen one so small? Yeah, it's pretty tiny. That’s why I got it. I've seen smaller.”
“Where is...”
“Where’s what?”
“Never mind.”
The door opened again. Janice’s irritation was automatic. Only half of it went away when she saw it was just Charlie Eagle Claw.
“Woooo! You should see it out there!” said the tall Native American.
Charlie had never once entered a room by stealth. He stomped his boots and threw his coat onto the hat rack from several feet away.
“Hey there darlin'” he said.
Janice barely knodded, her eyes were still glued to the TV at the end of the bar.
Hey dude, keepin' warm?” Charlie slapped the stranger on the back and sat next to him.
Janice worried that Charlie's well-meaning exuberance would knock the frail looking man off his stool.
The stranger didn't react.
“What'er you doing here Charlie Eagle Claw?” Janice said as she automatically poured him a draft.
“Are you kiddin'? It would take a lot more than snow and cold to keep me from my woman.”
Janice thumbed at the pony-tailed Indian and addressed the stranger, “Charlie here thinks he's some sorta boyfriend or something; even though he's NOT.”
“I am too your boyfriend, you just haven't accepted it yet.” Charlie was undaunted. “...and besides, 'HELLO', it's your birthday!”
“Oh God, here we go. What makes you think...”
“Today is your birthday?” said the stranger said. “December 24th?”
His voice was barely audible, but it stopped her short.
“Yeah, so.”
“That day, that birthday. I think there was someone… But I don’t....”
“Well if they had my birthday, they could tell you that it sucks. I hate my birthday. I hated it when I was four; I hated it when I was sixteen and I hate it now that I'm thirty... something.”
“Isn't she pretty when she gets all riled up?” Charlie said, giving the stranger a gentle nudge.
“And you! I would have forgotten all about it if you hadn't come in here all... and you didn't even get me a present did you?”
“Hey, I had something in mind but, ya know, I'm waiting on a check.” Charlie said.
“You know what's the worst thing about my birthday? When people give you birthday gifts wrapped in frickin' Christmas wrapping paper! And do you know why? Because they didn't get a birthday present at all, they just grabbed a Christmas present and gave it early! Charlie, your birthday's what, July right? What do people get you?”
“Drunk,” said Charlie.
“And what are you looking at?” Janice said to the stranger.
The stranger pushed his empty glass forward.
“You still haven't told me how you're getting home. Do you have a ride? Have you had anything to to eat?” Janice said.
“I don't remember eating and I'm pretty sure I have no car or a ride. What kind of bartender doesn’t want to sell a drink.”
“Well things are different these days.”
Janice pulled a package of Doritos off the display and tossed them in front of the man in the dark coat. She poured a glass of soda water and set it next to the chips.
“Here, take care of these and we'll get you another whiskey. The chips are on the house.”
“That's what I love about you J-Bird,” Charlie said.
“Awe Charlie, give it a rest. You don't love nuthin'... and I hate 'J-Bird' ”
“Awe, I thought you liked 'J-Bird'... J-Bird.”
“Keep it up nimrod.”
“C'mon, be nice. I love everything, you know that,” he said with a grand gesture.
“Everything, nothing, same difference,” said Janice. “And I don't care for Christmas too much either, in case ya'll were wonderin'.”
Charlie turned to the stranger. “Women, eh?”
The stranger barely looked up. He slowly reached for the bag of Doritos.
“I've tried everything I know to crack that nut.” Charlie said. “A lot of guys have. And I know what you're thinkin' but, no women either. Just a big thorny wall, that one. I can't help it though; I'm crazy about her.”
“You're crazy alright.” Janice added without looking away from the TV.
“So what's your story friend? What should I call ya?” Charlie said. He took the Doritos bag the stranger was struggling with and opened it. He took a chip for himself and handed the bag back to the stranger.
The stranger rubbed his forehead for a moment.
“I don’t know. No name, no story.”
“That's cool brother; a bit of mystique. Well, Merry Christmas buddy, glad to know ya.”
Charlie raised his glass.
“Wait a minute,” said Janice, “What do you mean: 'no name'?”
“You're going to think I'm crazy,” The stranger said. “Maybe I am.”
He finished a chip and fumbled with his glass of soda water. He drank it down like it was a shot. He cleared his throat and massaged his temples.
“Right now,” he said softly, “my entire life, my life as I know it, consists of the past twenty minutes. I remember seeing this place and walking up to the door. Before that: nothing.”
---
“Oh no. Carl! My water broke!”
Carl nearly lost control of the car.
“What? Are you sure?” he said.
She looked at him incredulously.
“Yes, I'm sure. Do you want to see the puddle I'm sitting in?”
“No, God no!” he said. “I’m sorry... what do we do?”
“Hospital, I guess.”
“Right, of course.”
Carl swallowed hard. He knew this would happen of course. He thought that somehow he would be ready for it when it did. He wasn't.
“How are we going to find of of those?”
“We could ask someone.”
“Who on earth are we going to...”
“Them,” Meg said pointing at a Ford Fairlane parked on the bridge they were about to go under. In the beam of it's headlights a man was standing by the railing looking down on the Interstate through the snow.
Carl stopped the car and cranked down the window.
“Excuse me, sir, where might I find a hospital around here?” Carl shouted up to the bridge through the wind.
The man leaned further over the bridge. Carl began to repeat his request thinking the man was trying to hear him better.
“Is there a hospital...”
The man turned and shouted something to the driver of the car. The driver shouted back and the man ran around to the passenger side.
Carl hit the gas. His Chevy Biscayne disappeared under the bridge in a cloud of snow dust.
“What is it?” Meg said. “Oh my God. That wasn't Sebastian was it?” She gripped Carl's arm and looked behind them. The car on the bridge was headed down the ramp and onto the Interstate.
“Can't be... impossible.” Carl said over the roar of the engine. “Even still, I'll bet he has lots friends he can call.”
They couldn't see the headlights of the Fairlane through the flurry of white they left behind them, but they both knew they were there.
---
“So, you can't remember anything? Your name, your family, where you’re from?... Dude, that's such a trip,” Charlie said to the stranger at the bar, “most people drink to forget, you're drinking to try and remember.”
“Maybe.”
“Hey, what about Christmas eve, the birthday? Didn't you say something about knowing someone with the same birthday as Janice here?”
“That's right,” said Janice. “What about that?”
The stranger put his head in his hands.
“I can’t... I'm trying so hard to remember. It’s important, It was a birthday, but not like a birthday, like a.. like fire or an accident.”
“What? What do you mean?” said Janice, like the date, not cake and ice cream?”
“I don’t know maybe, it’s not a person… I mean, it is but...”
“Ya mean like a dog or something?”
“No, no… I can’t… I need another drink.”
“I don’t know.” Janice said.
“For God sake! Please, I’m not… I just…”
“Okay, okay.”
Janice clanked the bottle on his glass letting some spill over in her haste.
He drank half the glass, took a breath and finished it.
“Oh God. It’s important, it’s like a birthday, but like an emergency.”
“Wait, you mean like childbirth? Like a baby being born?”
The stranger cried out like he was suddenly in pain.
“Oh dear God, that’s it! That’s it.”
He fell off the stool like he’d been hit in the jaw. Charlie caught him in mid-air and pulled him upright.
“I have to go. They’re out there, they need help! My God what have I been doing!”
The stranger tore himself away from Charlie and headed for the door.
“Whoa dude! Where you goin'? It's a blizzard out there,” Charlie said. He followed the man to the door his arms forming a semi-circle in front the stranger.
“No, I have to get back. I remember, the baby. Oh God. I've got to go, they're in danger!”
“Where? where were they, we’ll call the police” Janice said.
“I don't know, I don't know, out there, out there... a-a car, a bridge... there was a train.”
“A train?”
“Under the bridge I think.”
Janice pulled out her phone. “Dammit! what the hell happened, no signal, zero!” She picked up the old phone behind the bar.
“Dead. Charlie, pay phone, 9-1-1.”
“Yeah.”
Charlie ran to the phone by the door and pick up the receiver. He grabbed the stranger by his coat on his way outside.
“Dead here too.” He rattled the hook a few times before hanging up.
“You've got to let me go!” the stranger cried. Tears were running down his cheeks.
“Now just hang on a minute,” Charlie said. “Let's think about this: It's a blizzard out there, you been drinking and you ain't got no car.”
“But, but...”
“Just, just give me a second, okay.”
Charlie sat the man down at a booth near the door and conferred with Janice out of earshot.
“You think he's lost it.” Charlie said quietly.
“I don't know. He doesn't seem crazy, just freaked out, you know? Like those guys who come back from Iraq. There's just something about him. I dunno, I think maybe he's for real.”
“Yeah, I think so too.”
“He'll kill himself out there if we just let him go.” Janice said.
The stranger sat in the booth mumbling. His fist gently pounded the table.
“I'll take him. I got my truck. If someone's in trouble we'll find 'em.”
“Are you sure?”
“Course. How could we not help this guy; especially it being... ya know, your birthday and all.”
Charlie winked. But Janice was dead serious. She grabbed the large Native American by his leather vest and looked up at him with her dark eyes.
“Be careful... okay moron.”
Charlie beamed.
“How 'bout a good luck kiss now.”
“How 'bout a good luck kick in the balls.”
“Take what I can get baby,” he said as grabbed his coat motioned to the stranger.
“C'mon dude. Let’s go save the fuckin’ day.”
The stranger placed his wool hat back on his head. He was about to follow Charlie out of the door, he stopped and turned to Janice.
“For the whiskey,” said the stranger. He dipped into his pocket and handed the contents to Janice. “Sorry, it's all I have, I think.”
Janice watched out the window her face glowing red from the Budweiser neon. The truck lights disappear quickly in the thick blowing snow. There was a lump in her throat. She hated this feeling. She looked down at the money in her hand:
It was a five dollar bill and a couple of ones.
End Part I
Link to Part II
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